Sunday, May 20, 2012

John Denver

this sinking feeling
this hole in my soul
i am left reflecting
i am alone surrounded
undeserving of the blessings
undeserving of the love
the future seems so dismal
anti excitement comes with tommorrow
i am trapped here and now
mourning and wanting
wishing i were more than myself
afraid of my potential
afraid of failing
i hover like a roller coaster
having reached the top
i linger for this moment
this apex
the climb was too short
lost in the excitement
i am haunted by what i may have missed
i renounce the future
imprisoned by memories
i loath what comes next
stuck in the quicksand of regret
impartial to comforting words
pray for me
i am despair
woe is me
try to make it work
man these times
are hard
hard enough to harden
pardon me
while i burst
into tears
i wear my sorrow
i dare not see pictures
i want no tomorrow
yesterday is gone
once close now so far
though i had it
its gone now
and here i remain
my sadness is drownding
now back to the same
it makes me mad
insane inside
i lock myself away
internally i hide
i bury my burdens
with layers of guilt
feeling empty
i wilt