Im a freakin lump with no freakin drive and im just stuck in this pit zombie barely alive parylized and if lies i any longer in this place im gunna melt into a puddle of worthless waste wax off a candle hardened cause you is my flame and im wild inside with love you have me tamed cause i cant leave to go nowhere never without you and its odd cause im usually out doin what i do and im stuck kinda living for moments with you cause im kinda just waiting not knowing what to where i want to be is the future by your side fast forward to i missed you and pause before goodbye
Friday, December 2, 2016
The codex to my venacular i gravitate to your power-
full of spirit
the ledgendary stuff the poets doth named
get antiquitic when i prostrate
spit with firey tounges
until with vaccumed out lungs
im crumbled and dumb
from the songs that ive sung
praising the true God for what He has done
made me happy to be here and share this
inspired by you
id love to dismiss it
as no major deal
however i must to sound reason appeal
for the way i get moved on and lit up like lights
is no minor happenstance
its what i live for
not just comfy or pleasant
not ok or fine
its the real kind of feeling
that feels like a sign
and all of the signals
i get in the world
tell me im made to fit with
this Halee Grif girl
I get all excited
to do what i cant force
to make up bull
shit and divorce
from a device built for truth
for the craft of a writer
is being the slueth
finding little bits of wisdom tween the lines
plays with words
such fun when it rhymes
I wonder, especially when im like now in mid write rant if what the fuck im saying here make any lick of sense and i guess it doesnt matter much to anyone but me but im putting your name on things and that should not be taken lightly.
Im slightly embarrassed that i make spelling mistakes and that my spacing is goofy
and there are hard
and im sure at times awkward
it is to read all my ravings
how cant i get down though it
what other is the way be
Ive gotta get it out of me while the creative juices are flowing
so accept from me with apologies for how up your phone b blowin
for i know not else this man is to do cept his God given ability to love and love You
if ever i lose my mind or i die i want to to remember that the complete entierty of my focus at this very moment is the fuel your soul gives to a frozen block of poet.
Its important to me that i practice my craft
and to outsider eyes it may see daft this draft
but laugh as haters may
im addicted to this
and i cant help i love you and i give you my gift
Miss Griffin if you havent grown bored of this endless utter nonsense you get then im more than sure,
at peace in the world
for we are where we belong
so my obsession with you is anti-wrong
Thursday, December 1, 2016
On the reel tho
You are my cinematic end
ing bending my will towards better ends
Wrens flying sky bound above cloudy skys and pretends we like this sometimes cries come and frustration ensues lo no matter the weather im right behind you we are what is said of words in books and in the future i wont be one bit suprised when one gets published about us and the little shit i send and you get when im struck how enflamed i am in love with you Halee Grif
Wednesday, November 30, 2016
you display the most insane crazy floral aura like in a whirlpool im all twisted curled and spinning in love with you
waves they crash in this river of timed space its tidal forces beat upon the shore of this moment and if you pick up a seashell and listen youll hear bell-like music straight angel harp its
and the beat is playful up-tempo le shit and you never want that to quit and it wont cause its more than legitimate
it is my heart song playing currently for you its repeating forever on and in and through to your dial my soul is past-forever tuned
you swoon me and when we spoon the little dogs laugh and dishes run away and cows jump over moons
Monday, November 28, 2016
Awake in the early morn
when more than the majority
are found midst deepest their slumberings
and i in envy of them.
Wide wake wondering im
over and over turning
and woe-ing over particulars,
circular twister whisper blows.
Envisioning terrible sorts of scenes,
displaying fantastic make-believe things.
im sick with this.
Self-made worry bout
how it may/may not work itself out.
Eating at me.
Subjectively silly seeming
feelings of weakness filling.
I fret and doubt.
Will in me unwilling.
It keeps me sleepless .
How long up will i keep this?
Lame duck stayed up.
Awake here im stuck.
Waste-to-self-laying with this
Sit i eyes open
in some distant room,
Caring not to disturb the house-held,
the sense of impending doom.
Quietly, quite frightfully,
i pace, fearing they'll hear my stirs,
spelling sleepy lines of questioning; of which id be deserved.
Like: 'why not are you to bed yet, dont you know its late?'
Id rather avoid that situation, in no mood to conversate.
The fact that day is soon to break leads me to evaluate my mind's insomniatic dumbed down state...
Labours on the daily making dollars like before,
that feeling of security gone
i want it back but this time more
Im found laying bout, unable,
feeling worthlessly unemployed.
This funk creeps in and poisons me.
Deliver me oh Lord
Accomplishing some visions
seems harder than before
It felt like i was getting inside
and now fate has shut the door.
Four figured sums in bank accounts seemed to make for better days.
Ive forgotten that im worth a damn
stuck in this shifting phase.
Certainly the current thing (not sleeping yet) is not at all a corrective action.
Anxious mixed with sleep deprived, im void of satisfaction.
Increasingly burdened and annoyed with this vexing me,
Im wondering if i let it consume me if there will be anything left of me.
My mood is a victim abused,
my mind's health being neglected.
Turned inside, upon itself,
my imagination became a weapon...
'Sleep you fool!
Get shut thine eyes at once,'
Inside my head i say to selves:
'Youre kinda being cunts.'
Disturbed with recognition, of conversations in my head,
in a tone un-sublime, to myself I've replied:
'i'll sleep well when im good and fucking dead!'