speak it out. (LOUD)

moked a widdle
foyer eh
empty
feline furry
passed
in
ten
cents
bee end
in up
lie
kite aught
never down
never once

go in moon
sty el es raw
like miss
taken
voy err
foo lish
can tween
nitches
may kind i put
stitches
on
owl
yawn
dare brains
need goo ruses
ween
threw yall
ike like
udder
butter
cut
i .

through.
you?

be cool. live and let ___

so here we go again. rebuilding like israel over rubble. where do we begin? the sins. its the insecure sexuality. stemming far back as freud would dare stare. its not unique but it is not the same. every time. it happens like this. fixation. self mutilation. evaporation. nothing here breeds exploration. honestly cant place where it went all fully wrong but it matters not here is a lonely mans song:
like a flying thing soared like an eagle on planes of winds
vortex on high lows with dipping as friends
i icarus
fallen back
wisdom wins
the good thing coming to those who can wait is a thing of forever
impatience never wins
lost temper and temperance
and living lies like its life
cost me everything
everything
i am
once again
this

 shit pile i
never
ending
more than twice
tale as old as time and
 ways that dont change

keep on
creeping
in

man i tell you once its lost its gone
this life keeps all my
chi pinned
cheapened

literally i
cause this pain on myself
and sulk away most typically
uneventful
my mind is made of mental infatuations
imaginations making me mad in some degrees
exhibiting
characteristics detrimental
to a man who can be called
one at all

this dude in the mirror explicitly requests
you pull. your. self. together.
quicklickity 
on the splits
beween the options
this leaves us
you me and
me myself
and
i
in this we do
the only thing left which is....

Moved. on

i wish you happiness Halee. God bless. ive got a lot of work to do. sorry it has been so difficult for me to accept where i am and how i got here. you have your people, old and knew. flames to heat your soul. i became lifeless grey and cold. and i wish you warmth and peace truth be told. seconds become chances and i squander mine consistantly. i missed the mark and the contrast is stark between what i envisioned my life as and what is reality. he deserves you now as we come full circle. how ironic this cosmic role reversal. you will always be my beacon, example of beauty, magically amazing, a naturally good human being,  choosing righteous. im fortunate and glad i got to knew thee. to lose that bond is a rare and unique cruelty. fate sucks balls and so sorry im for mistaking your love and kind heart as free for the taking. unconditional love is not to be expected. failed miserably ive now earned this feeling of being rejected. i love you in ways you cant understand and ill never forgive myself for being less than a man for you because as the woods lakes streams and forests get you back in their lives im left wishing wanting thinking and getting no replies

swamp thang

what can i offer anyone that wont be refused? feel chewed up and spat out like life is a snooze. want to sleep till im dead and the world isnt lame and i want more than the waking to more of the same lack of drive and this helpless feel of slack all the day as i barely make livable this shit show display. i feel funky and fucked up a freak on a show or a beat up set on fire shotgun weilding hobo. im a rampage. im on one. get the fuck out my way cause i might just come out of this but not likely today. the future is seeming to be not what expected and every time im afraid something ends up neglected. as of late its quite common im a frightened lost soul with his head in the sand with the moles digging holes. paranoia paranoia nobody coming to get me but i wish they would cause all i ever was proud to be has left me. im soft as a sofa and im living in my room with a tv and phone and an impending doom feeling always over me shadowing like a little black rain cloud and the rumbles of thunder scare down when the loud noises of thunder and lightning from thoughts burst out sounds on me so ought not i change my weather pattern any way known for if i stay in this storm thats within me im more alone than is shown once the shine way was mine and i shone through with brilliance making colors in interactions like rainbows in the distance until this creepy swamp icky took over my every man i swear its deep and its cold and really fucking heavy

Black of wanting

she taught me the rules.
i rolled the dice.
falling...
end.
scene.
seen
her,
she
serene,
still.
like lovely.
not knowing.
who?
new.
knew?
two.
much
kindness.
candid.
turn't.
turned
friendship
positivley
positivity.
radiation
radiates
an
illumination,
it looms
in rooms
illuminates
imagination
and negates hate;
easily.
(adding to
haters' self
defeating
frusturation).
offer
we all
as gathered.
to these
new friends.
never before,
never.
be
four.
again.
got
halves
of high
fives.
had
have
mad
laughs.
that.
lasts.
not oft.
do we?
not often
enough...
not begotten
to be gettin;
that is,
to be
going far
away
from
here.
what for?
it is.
near,
here.
clear.
called here
all
today.
all smitten.
still,
there.
passed
past
Feb. are
you?
wary?
there isnt ever
ne'er near where
we thought it to be.
iso
you
so are
sore.
i swear.
be so.
a player.
so. there.
so.
there.

netscum

this world
beyond me
how fucked up it has gotten

tonight i hung out with the gals
and though they may be ruling us all now
they have got it all wrong

individuslistic
can do anything
without you
drop you at the first sign
of slight
discomfort
these bitches
be trippin like they high on somethin'

great power
abused and corrupt
innocence lost
in cell phones by age 9
earlier even

its getting worse
with the sex and the pleasure
dating apps and pictures
self destruct
its whatever

cant trust nobody
but read everyone
cant rely on a mfer
be simple
man
son

fuck the sober
square lifes a joke
lifes a noose
then the floor drops out
you choke

boar ring

you get er done? ready to hang yet? i been thinking bout you like you burst from a giant sky fallen rain drop, came. wet.
could have rang me. shame slept.
got me up. rung ear hear here.
dame step. quit playin. aint no ref. so hurry. im graffiti. word sprayin

fer instance time instants are on fire they fly. think you can grab them  but on on your way the light dies. then they are lost so you look somewhere else hoping to capture a lit one cause to hold one happily is all that youre after. some little piggies eat roast beef. others get none. some people stay home while still others run. errands like market going stay on their toes and the like, me im all about the ride so ill be just doin it. nike.
game prep. rally round me like you so alt make me pepp. er not. need a doctor cause last i checked im in/impatient.  bland i isnt thats for show. spicy tho. either way. hey gurl hey. lead me to this word play. never gunna send it tho. save it for a cloudy day